Can you hear the silence?
Can you hear it call you?
It whispers your name…
The walls echo a reply
Did you hear it?
Search your soul
Search deep within
Find that which is hidden
Hidden from your own eyes too
Did you find it?
That is the sound of the spirits
They have come to lay claim on your soul
You don’t say goodbye
You are out of time
A feeling I identify with
A state I have been in lately
This describes me right now
Darkness ensues all around me
The light in my room, still burns
I scribble these notes on these pages
I am awake and I don’t know why
I didn’t know growing up would be such a task
of the future and all it holds
About the future and all it holds
I know it will eventually be fine
Maybe I should give it time
I know what this means
Yet, I can’t explain
Stay true to yourself. Never be ashamed of doing what feels right. Decide what you think is right and stick to it.
I have not been here in a long while. I have not had a moment of stillness for the couple of months. As we enter the 2nd half of this year, I will purpose to:
- Be still;
- Pray more;
- Listen more;
- Read more.
It takes zeal and constant dedication to achieve that. A short list of exercises that when well executed will lead me to discoveries beyond self.
As I grow one year older, I purpose to be a better man, better brother and to stay improving day by day…
I am tormented by my dreams
Tortured by this fleeting glimpse of hope
Frustrated with this difficult life.
So I look to the setting sun, therein lies beauty of the creator
The starless night sky
As the moon hides away from my sight
I feel the lifeless cold of the tiled floor
The drip drop of the tap
and the smell of the rotting garbage
Nimbus clouds gather in the distance,
The rain is coming
Dampening my old darkened mood
“In this world, it is too common for people to search for someone to lose themselves in. But I am already lost. I will look for someone to find myself in.”
― C. JoyBell C.
I am still finding me.
I left my body in this chair as my soul drifts away
Searching for that I cannot attain
Longing for that which cannot quench
Like it was yesterday,
It will remain nothing but a memory
That which we could have had
I will remember
When I do, I will walk away
And I will remind you
That this was nothing but a dream,
As I wake up
The call of the Hadada Ibis.
The sun on my skin,
Footsteps in the distance.
You are not here.
The howl of the dogs,
The glow of the moonlight,
You are not here.
The happy laughter of children,
I am tormented by your silence.
There is no apology or excuse befitting my silence. I will just lay it here plainly: I am sorry.
It is cold here but it is even colder without you. I know those are not the words I planned to start with. You see, while thinking about what to write to you today, I took a walk. I took a walk in the forest near home to declutter my mind. I don’t know how that turned out. I feel much better now and the computer is not repulvise anymore.
I have a lot of explaining to do but I don’t if this is the right forum. I hope that we can talk soon so that we clear the air.
I walked out on you and I am sorry about that. Now, it is clear that my life is not complete without you in it.
While growing up, I longed to be an adult. Now that I am an adult; I look back with longing at my childhood and sometimes I wish I could turn back the hands of time and be a child one more time. I had a wonderful childhood and I would never change anything about it. I grew around loving parents and crazy simblings. Home is still magical and the reunions (now that the simblings are scattered all over the world) are nothing short of the madness expected. I am blessed beyond measure.
I choose happiness.
I digress. I am sorry that I walked out on you. You see, I was ashamed.
Ashamed that I could not look you in the eye and tell you that I failed you;
Ashamed that I let you down;
Ashamed of the monster I became instead of the man I should have been;
I now see how much I wronged you.
Benjamin Franklin said that; “Never ruin an apology with an excuse”
Therefore, it is better that I end this post here.
You mean more than you know
Image source: Google Images
I hope to hear from you soon!
I lie here in silence
The walls are bare
Your scent lingers the room
Maybe I was wrong.
It could have been
Yet it never was
So I lie here in silence
Waiting and hoping
Let us take that walk
Dare to dream again
Let us be once more
Who thought we could be!
A great day to you!
Quote of the day:
“Be happy in the moment. that’s enough. Each moment is all we need, not more.”